the life of me

my personality (or so the internet says)

jossthejoss — Tue, 02 Jan 2007 10:56:12 +0000

Advanced Global Personality Test Results

Extraversion	\|\|\|\|\|\|	30%
Stability	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	73%
Orderliness	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	46%
Accommodation	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	43%
Interdependence	\|\|	10%
Intellectual	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	76%
Mystical	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	36%
Artistic	\|\|\|\|\|\|	23%
Religious	\|\|	10%
Hedonism	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	90%
Materialism	\|\|\|\|\|\|	23%
Narcissism	\|\|	10%
Adventurousness	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	50%
Work ethic	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	76%
Self absorbed	\|\|\|\|\|\|	30%
Conflict seeking	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	90%
Need to dominate	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	83%

Romantic	\|\|	10%
Avoidant	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	56%
Anti-authority	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	90%
Wealth	\|\|\|\|	16%
Dependency	\|\|	10%
Change averse	\|\|	10%
Cautiousness	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	36%
Individuality	\|\|\|\|\|\|	23%
Sexuality	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	90%
Peter pan complex	\|\|	10%
Physical security	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	56%
Physical Fitness	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	50%
Histrionic	\|\|	10%
Paranoia	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	83%
Vanity	\|\|\|\|\|\|	30%
Hypersensitivity	\|\|	10%
Female cliche	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	50%

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No where to go…

jossthejoss — Mon, 01 Jan 2007 00:06:00 +0000

You’re all dressed up with no were to go,
No point in sitting by the phone
Seams like the high black heals
Just aren’t enough to make him feel.
All you want to do is cry, but you’ll say
’Nothings wrong’,
you got your black dress on
When they ask you’ll say ‘ I’m doing fine’
but in your head, you’re out of your mind

crazy bitch….

jossthejoss — Fri, 29 Dec 2006 17:12:21 +0000

All right!

Break me down, you got a lovely face
We’re going to your place
And now you got to freak me out
Scream so loud, getting fuckin’ laid
You want me to stay, but I got to make my way

Hey
You’re a crazy bitch
But you fuck so good, I’m on top of it
When I dream, I’m doing you all night
Scratches all down my back to keep me right on

Take it ALL, the paper is your game
You jump in bed with fame
Another one night paid in full, uh
You’re so fine, it won’t be a loss
Cashing in the rocks, just to get you face to face

Hey
You’re a crazy bitch
But you fuck so good, I’m on top of it
When I dream, I’m doing you all night
Scratches all down my back to keep me right on

Get the video
Fuck you so good
Get the video
Fuck you so good

Crazy bitch
Crazy bitch
Crazy…bitch

Hey
You’re a crazy bitch
But you fuck so good, I’m on top of it
When I dream, I’m doing you all night
Scratches all down my back to keep me right on

Hey
You’re a crazy bitch
But you fuck so good, I’m on top of it
When I dream, I’m doing you all night
Scratches all down my back, come on

Baby girl
You want it all
To be a star
You’ll have to go down

the hell of me

jossthejoss — Thu, 28 Dec 2006 14:53:45 +0000

Im board. For the last 8 days I’ve been staying up till at least 4 in the morning and then sleeping till around 1.30 in the after noon. My body feels so fucked up right now. I’ve been drunk more than I’ve been sober, I’ve been completely rejected by a guy for the first time, and the paternal-half-of-my-DNA’s ignorant slut wont stop running her mouth about me. You now when people talk about you and act like they don’t want you to hear but are actually try to make it loud enough for you to hear? Well the dumb bitch hasn’t said a word to my face since I’ve been here, but every time I’m one room away from here, she starts running her mouth. I’m sick of this shitty vacation. I actually think im feeling more violence and hate right now then ever before in my life. If you know me you’ll realize how sick that is because I really am one of the people that normally HATES 95% of everything…. and yes I do mean EVERYTHING. I need an outlet for my anger before I beat the living shit out of that pig….. ok enough ranting. Im going to go shooting. Guns and target practice always make me feel better…….

the last straw……

jossthejoss — Wed, 27 Dec 2006 15:32:34 +0000

Oh my fucking god……. I am going to have a fucking freak out….. this was seriously my last straw…… apparently I am the most repulsive, disgusting, un-desirable female on the face of the planet….. last night I was at his house and we were drinking and things heated up and I was thinking ‘about fucking time’ and then he pulled me into his room and we were in bed and the close come off and things are going great and then…… he stops. And I’m like, what’s wrong? And he’s like Im really sorry, but im kind of to drunk and I kind of feel like im gona be sick…
Yeah, so I think I just got rejected. First time ever. I don’t think I like it. I asked him if it was me and he said no and I asked him if he even wanted to sleep with me and he said yes but I just don’t know………….. I mean I’ve known him fo 6.5 months. That’s half a year. I can honest to god say that since I lost my virginity, I have never had a guy that I want to sleep with not sleep with me…… and its never taken this long to get a guy I wanted to sleep with into bed. So yeah, I’ve now spent the last five months trying to get a guy into bed and now I think he doesn’t even want to sleep with me. If I was able to cry I would right now. Well actually I wouldn’t but this is one of the times I kind of wish I had more than four emotions because I feel like I should be sad or hurt or something but all I am is fucking pissed…….AND I STILL WANA SLEEP WITH HIM!!!!!

the scenario 2

jossthejoss — Sat, 23 Dec 2006 17:30:13 +0000

Ok so………
Its 1:30 in the morning, the two of you had a beer and watched a movie in his room. Your laying on his been watching the movie, he’s got his arms around you and he’s holding you so close you can feel the hard-on……what happens next? Well you might think that things would progress from there, which they did, and after that you might think that there’s going to be some serious fucking soon wouldn’t you? I mean at lest that’s how it usually works for me when its just a physical thing, we hang out, get a beer (just 1), go back to the house, watch a movie and before you’ve seen enough to guess the plot your to preoccupied to watch the movie…….but in this scenario……..well, it was all the same until you get to the movie part……..so, towards the middle/end of the movie, we were joking around, and then we were kind of wrestling, you know, the hole play/fight thing, and I pined him to the bed so he couldn’t move that much. I was kind of teasing him a little but he didn’t mind. I would actually say he liked it based on the response from his pants….(catch my drift?)…..but then we rolled over so he was on top (mind you, were both completely dressed) were it…. well we’ll just say his amount of happiness rose…….. but then of all shitty fucking things, the fucking chair fell over, (its missing a wheel) and he stood up to pick it up (still happy) but when he laid back down, he laid down beside/behind me……. its not like it was completely horrible , I mean he had his arms around me, he was holding me really close (like I said, so close you can feel the hard-on) and it was really sweet but ten seconds before that stupid chair fell over, we were seeing way more red…… I just don’t really get it…. I mean he already had it going up ( not like full out erection, but more than half way there) close were practically about to take themselves off, and the chair didn’t even make that much noise when it fell over, it could have been completely ignored….. I don’t get it………….. What guy goes from just about to take a girls close off to cuddling when he’s already got it up? I thought that hurt ………… What am I missing………………… What’s wrong with me…………….?

the scenario

jossthejoss — Thu, 21 Dec 2006 22:57:50 +0000

here’s the scenario for you:
I have a friend who I’m physically attracted to. We’re able to have intelligent conversations, we spend a lot of time together, we laugh, we cry, blah blah blah… Im not gorgeous but I don’t think I’m a complete dog, we’re both single, he acts like he wants me on a physical level, I’ve given him every ‘go’ sign, I’m not asking for any kind of relationship, so, to put it bluntly, why aren’t we fucking? What is it I’m missing? I know he’s not gay and I know he’s not a virgin, so…… what’s going on here? What more does a girl need to do just to sleep with some one? What I want is completely physical. Why am I not getting it?

the thoughts of me ( for now)

jossthejoss — Thu, 21 Dec 2006 11:28:46 +0000

im bord, i miss bording school life (which is actually really sad), i want to kill the paternal-half-of-my-dna’s stupid dumb bitch, im really angry, theres no heat in my house, and thats not even the worst of it becouse the worst of it is that im extremly sexualy frustrated! ahhhhhhh!!! fuck you N…….

the stats….

jossthejoss — Wed, 20 Dec 2006 12:36:29 +0000

So yah, I now live in Denmark. its ok. I have this one friend, (a guy) who was the first person I meet in Denmark. Well he’s really hot. But I think he’s not into me, but I don’t get why… I mean, we’re good friends, he doesn’t have a girlfriend, Im not gorgeous but I don’t think I’m a total dog……… we spend a lot of time together and he’s really touchy with me, but, evan though I think I’ve made it clear that I want to and have been giving him every opportunity to make the move, we’ve yet to screw and I don’t get why………I’m actually beginning to think he mite be gay, but if he’s gay why does he have his hands all over me every time I see him?!?!?!?!?!?! ahhh i just dont get danish guys…….